An Awful Way
by hujhax
Summary: A fanfic-dramatization of the rest of the night after _Eli's Coming._


_An Awful Way  
_

[This takes place during and immediately after _Eli's Coming_ (episode 11, season 1).]   


[opening title. Airport background noises.]  


ISAAC: [slurred throughout] I don't know who your boss is, [fade into Isaac on a bench in an airport, arguing with two EMT's] but my boss is Luther Sachs, and he doesn't like sick days!  
EMT #1: This is a stroke. You're not going to just shake it off, Mr. Jeffery.  
ISAAC: Isaac Jaffe.  
EMT #1: Fine.  
EMT #2: [to EMT #1] Calm down.  
EMT #1: I can't believe this.  
ISAAC: I'm fine. [waving them off] Go help sick people.  
EMT #1: What, Mr. Jaffe, are you just going to _walk _out of here?  
ISAAC: [said with authority that hits the EMT] Don't take that tone with me. I'll walk out of here when I'm damn good and ready.   
EMT #1: Twenty minutes ago, you _collapsed_, right?  
ISAAC: I was woozy.  
EMT #1: Okay.  
ISAAC: From the plane.   
EMT #1: [sarcastic] Sure.  
ISAAC: I'll be fine.  
EMT #2: [shoos EMT #1 aside.] I'm sorry. He's had a bad day.  
ISAAC: A bad day?  
EMT #2: He was called on this –  
ISAAC: And I'm supposed to go to the hospital with _him_?  
EMT #2: It's not –  
ISAAC: When I have a bad day, my show goes to hell; when an EMT has a bad day, people end up dead.  
EMT #2: Mr. Jaffe, listen. There's a chance that if you're not treated you'll end up dead. You seem like a good guy, Isaac, and we don't want anything bad to happen to you.  
ISAAC: [beat] Then leave me alone. I'll just go to work after I get my suitcase from the… [trails off]  
EMT #2: The –  
ISAAC: [calm; perplexed] No, don't tell me.  
EMT #2: [indicating the baggage carousel] That thing right over there?  
ISAAC: I know I know this.  
EMT #1: [irritated] You're disoriented. It's normal.  
ISAAC: That _thing_. The thing that moves all the luggage around, and the people take their luggage off of it, and now I don't know what it _is_. [short beat] I don't even remember _packing_ my suitcase. What the hell's wrong with me?  
EMT #2: Isaac?  
ISAAC: Mmm?  
EMT #2: Headache?  
ISAAC: Yes.  
EMT #2: Bad?  
ISAAC: Mm-hmm.  
EMT #2: You weak on one side?  
ISAAC: [looks up slowly, points to his left side] Here.  
EMT #2: And that slurred speech – you didn't get drunk on the duty-free liquor, did you?  
ISAAC: [tiny laugh, then] No.  
EMT #2: Okay.   
ISAAC: Is it bad?  
EMT #2: We really can't tell until we have a diagnostic –  
ISAAC: [a little scared] Is it bad?  
EMT #2: [sighing] It might be, yeah. [short beat] So we need to –  
ISAAC: [peremptorily holding up his hand] I'll go.   
EMT #2: Okay [EMT #1 helps him up; EMT #2 gets a wheelchair.]  
EMT #1: 'Baggage carousel.'  
ISAAC: What?  
EMT #1: [helping him on] That thing. The thing without the name.  
ISAAC: [Getting on the wheelchair; to EMT #2] What the hell is he talking about?  
EMT #2: It's not important. Is there anyone we should contact?  
ISAAC: Esther's still in London, with…  
EMT #1: Should we call, what, Luther Sachs?  
ISAAC: [thinking] They're doing their show.  
EMT #1: Okay…  
ISAAC: They're happy. It can wait.  
EMT #2: Let's go.   


* * *

  
[Ext shot Presbyterian Hospital – night]  
DANA: This is impossible!  
[Int shot. DANA and NATALIE are at the registration desk, arguing with a NURSE]  
NURSE: Lady, it is totally possible.   
DANA: You have a state-of-the-art computer system, you have to fill out fifteen forms every time someone _coughs_ around here – it is impossible that you _lost_ him!  
NURSE: I can't –  
DANA: Don't tell me you can't find Isaac Jaffe!  
NURSE: Jeffery?  
NATALIE: [smiles] Um – it's J-A-F-F-E.  
NURSE: That's what I thought. [types a few more things in; getting irate] We don't have any record of him.  
NATALIE: [to Dana] If he were here, Esther would be here.  
DANA: He was admitted here four hours ago. Male, black, sixty-five.  
NATALIE: Older.  
DANA: A _little _older.   
NURSE: He's not on file.  
NATALIE: If he were here, they would have him on file.  
NURSE: [tearing off printout] I've got no Jaffe here, just a whole mess of car accidents. You can look at the sheet yourself if you want, but I've got more important things to do. [She walks away.]  
NATALIE: Is it just me, or did it get Antarctic in here?  
DANA: Good to know Isaac's in such caring hands.  


[CASEY enters]  


CASEY: Hey.  
NATALIE: Hey.  
DANA: Casey, what are you doing back? You're supposed to be recording the teaser!  
CASEY: Yeah, Dana. Isaac's lying unconscious here in this hospital somewhere, but you know what's really important? Tomorrow's advertising.  
DANA: You're the one lecturing about how important our jobs are.   
CASEY: Jeremy could get by with just one of us. Dan was recording audio when I left.  
DANA: Who said Dan had to stay?  
CASEY: We flipped a coin. He should be here any minute. Where's Isaac?  
NATALIE: They're saying he's not even in the hospital.  
CASEY: Esther told me Presbyterian.  
DANA: Did Esther give you a phone number? [CASEY shakes his head.] _Casey!  
_NATALIE: [CASEY starts to speak – she cuts him off] I was about to do some investigative reporting.  
CASEY: Good luck. I've been all over the place just trying to find you guys.  
DANA: [shakes her head; gets nurse's attention] You. Yes, I'm not done with you. Let me speak to your supervisor.  
NURSE: Honey, it's one in the morning. I _am_ the supervisor.  
DANA: [in background] Then you should be doing your job!  
NURSE: [with a smile] I can call security.  
NATALIE: [overlapping as she leaves] Wanna help?  
CASEY: Sure. [They leave as the NURSE and DANA continue arguing]  


[Elsewhere in the hospital, DAN is being accosted by a fan]  
RANDOM DOCTOR: Mr. Rydell, you do great work on _Sports Night_. I really like the show.  
DAN: That's great, and it's great talking to you, but I've got to [vague gesture meaning 'leave']  
RANDOM DOCTOR: Sure.  
DAN: Great. [As soon as he turns around, the smile goes, and he looks like hell. He walks through a door, down a short hallway, and into another room. By the time he gets there, he's shaking. He tries to shake it off.]  
CASEY: Hey.  
DAN: [jumping a mile] Jesus!   
CASEY: Yes, my son.  
DAN: [relief] Casey. [nods] How's Isaac?  
CASEY: We still don't know anything. [reacts to Dan's haggard appearance.] How're you?  
DAN: Fine. [laughs] Not so good.  
CASEY: Where's –  
DAN: Jeremy's editing together audio for the teaser. Be here later.  
CASEY: [still reacting to Dan's haggard appearance] What was it you had to tell me before? [This animates Dan a bit; he takes a seat, with an "are you ready for _this_?" look]  
DAN: What's the biggest surprise I could tell you right now?  
CASEY: That John Kruk made thirty-one feet in the men's pole vault.  
DAN: What's the biggest non-sports-related surprise I could tell you right now?  
CASEY: That cream cheese [short beat] is made of people.  
DAN: You're not helping. [NATALIE enters] Natalie, what's the biggest surprise I could tell you right now?  
NATALIE: That San Francisco is being attacked by giant armadillos.   
DAN: Steve Cisco was in Rebecca's office today.  
NATALIE: I think the armadillos are a bigger surprise.  
DAN: And I know why.  
CASEY: This is the big surprise?  
DAN: They're. Still. Married. [they react]  
NATALIE: _Awww_.  
CASEY: Hello.   
DAN: Yes.  
CASEY: We have a winner!  
NATALIE: Rebecca is still married to Steve Cisco?  
DAN: Yes.  
CASEY: Why is Rebecca still married to Steve Cisco?  
NATALIE: Why is _anybody_ married to Steve Cisco?  
DAN: Both of these are questions I've thought of.  
NATALIE: The man has no lips!  
DAN: Hadn't thought of that, but yes.  
NATALIE: And he's a jerk.  
CASEY: What, you don't like it when guys call you a nice –  
NATALIE: NO, I don't. Steve Cisco sucks.  
DAN: Natalie, Rebecca's choosing him over me; don't dog him too much.  
NATALIE: Well, she's just wrong, and I'll continue to dog him.  
CASEY: Why was he in her office?  
DAN: They've been separated. They're thinking of getting back together.  
CASEY: What, are there kids involved?  
DAN: [short pause] Dear god, I hope not. [DANA enters]  
DANA: Natalie.  
NATALIE: What's the biggest surprise I could tell you right now?  
DANA: [ignoring question] You aren't doing your investigative reporting?  
CASEY: Lame surprise.  
DANA: Bite me, Casey.  
CASEY: Well, I –  
DANA: Natalie – let's talk. [DANA exits.]  
NATALIE: They said if Isaac was here, he'd be in neurology.  
CASEY: We're on it. [NATALIE exits]  
DAN: So gossip spreads.  
CASEY: So it spins its web.  
DAN: Because Natalie could not keep a secret in a bucket.  
CASEY: She couldn't keep a secret on a _leash_. [beat]  
DAN: [stops] Do you think Isaac is – y'know, could be already…  
CASEY: What, d–  
DAN: Yeah.  
CASEY: [with certainty] No. No I don't.  
DAN: Nah. [beat; they start walking again] Didn't think so either.   
CASEY: So how was your day with Bobbi Bernstein?  
DAN: [laughs, shakes head] Not so good.  


[Cut to other room]  


DANA: I threatened to sack the desk wench, but she wasn't about to help. I don't think Isaac is even here, Natalie. Have you found out _anything_?  
NATALIE: Dana, I am in a crisis.  
DANA: What's wrong?  
NATALIE: Rebecca. She's _married_.  
DANA: [shocked reaction, then] Awww.   
NATALIE: I got him into this.   
DANA: _Natalie_…  
NATALIE: I should –  
DANA: Don't get like this. Not now. Stay focused.   
NATALIE: I should have seen the signs.  
DANA: Signs?  
NATALIE: I can see it now. There were signs.  
DANA: What signs?  
NATALIE: Of this whole thing. The Cisco fiasco.  
DANA: God, what a lout. Do you know what Steve Cisco called me?  
NATALIE: Do you know what he called _me_?  
DANA: He said you were a nice –  
NATALIE: Yeah. Plus – he has no lips.  
DANA: He doesn't, does he.  
NATALIE: If I had paid attention when he first met Rebecca, everything would be fine now.  
DANA: You just introduced them. And they've been really happy, and it's not your fault that Rebecca has, occasionally, taste in men that borders on pathological. Some people are just stupid like that.  
NATALIE: Jennifer from Accounting, and Rebecca, and Dan, and I were in an elevator. Dan had been talking to Rebecca, and he got a phone call.  
DANA: And he took it?   
NATALIE: Yeah.  
DANA: In the elevator?  
NATALIE: Yes.  
DANA: That's rude.  
NATALIE: That's what I said. Then Jennifer from Accounting said, "Be nice. For a sportscaster, he's a nice guy." Then Rebecca said, under her breath, "For a _sportscaster_, he's a _god_."  
DANA: Dan's a sports _anchor_.  
NATALIE: Rebecca's a marketing analyst. I don't think she knows the difference.  
DANA: [thinking it through] So you _thought _she really liked Dan.  
NATALIE: [nodding] And instead, she was just slamming everybody in our line of work.  
DANA: Hmm. We don't like Rebecca, do we?  
NATALIE: You and I have to take care of Dan and Casey –  
DANA: Mmm.  
NATALIE: – and I don't like people jerking them around.   
DANA: Yeah. [puts a hand on NATALIE's shoulder] You should be helping me track down Isaac.  
NATALIE: Everything happens for a reason, Dana, and my egregious Rebecca mistake is showing me the world is just _nuts_… jeez, maybe you aren't even secretly in love with Casey.  
DANA: I am not secretly in love with Casey. I secretly _hate_ Casey.  
NATALIE: No, you _openly_ hate Casey.  
DANA: That's right.  
NATALIE: But you're _secretly_ in love with him. [short beat]  
DANA: [a bit vulnerable] Do you think he's secretly in love with _me_?  
NATALIE: _Yes._   
DANA: He doesn't act like it.  
NATALIE: That's because it's Casey's _secret_.   
DANA: [Beat. Dana's cell phone rings. Beep.] Hello? Okay. [Hands phone to Natalie] Jeremy.  
NATALIE: Hey sweetie. Okay, I'll meet you. [beep. Hands phone back.] He's on his way in.  
DANA: [Shaking head] I'm going to start calling hospitals. If Isaac's not here, he has to be somewhere.  


* * *

  
[CASEY and DAN walk into an elevator lobby.]  
CASEY: Where else would the Hotel de Spain be? [DAN presses the elevator button]  
DAN: [a perfectly logical explanation] Bobbi had said it was in Andorra.  
CASEY: Dan?  
DAN: I know.  
CASEY: Andorra is a mountain principality about the size of Rhode Island.  
DAN: I know that _now_.  
CASEY: You don't spend a night drunk on the Eurail and wake up in _Andorra_.  
DAN: Yeah, when you're done beating that into the ground, give me a call.  
CASEY: So you weren't lying to her?  
DAN: I thought I wasn't, but I was. I'm no better than Rebecca.  
CASEY: Dan –  
DAN: Okay, I'm no better than Gordon. We can agree _Gordon's_ a liar.  
CASEY: [impromptu impression] "Dana, I'm… sorry. I'm going to be working… late tonight."  
DAN: On a little job called Sally.  
CASEY: God. Thinking of him with Dana makes me sick.  
DAN: And you're lying to Dana.  
CASEY: [short beat] I'm withholding the whole horrible truth from Dana. And trust me, she's better off not hearing it.  
DAN: That you were sleeping with Sally Sasser as well.  
CASEY: Keep it down, will you?   
DAN: Fine.  
CASEY: I hate this. Secrets.   
DAN: Like being spies.  
CASEY: Hushed conversations.   
DAN: Very hush-hush.  
CASEY: It just feels bad.   
DAN: It's driving you to the edge.  
CASEY: Another big scare like this and I think I'll go _unhinged_.   
DAN: Already there, my friend.  
CASEY: And… [wary of telling DAN this, but wanting to get it off his chest] and every time I talk to Dana, it's like –   


[Elevator dings, opens as NATALIE enters the lobby – CASEY and DAN are suddenly quiet]  


NATALIE: Has either of you seen Jeremy?  
CASEY: Oh. Hey, Natalie. [awkward pause]  
NATALIE: What's up?  
CASEY: What?  
NATALIE: What were you two talking about?  
CASEY: Oh… [looks to Dan, who smiles and watches him twist in the wind. The elevator shuts and goes.] Masculine. Hygiene.   
NATALIE: ["Why not just tell me to go away?"] Oh. Okay. Well, I'll go look for Jeremy then. [She exits]  
DAN: I think I've figured out why you don't like lying, Casey.  
CASEY: Not asking you why.  
DAN: [hits the button again] It's because you are the worst liar that has ever lived.  


[NATALIE waits in a waiting room, pacing, humming to herself. Jeremy enters, tired, but brightens on seeing her.]  


JEREMY: Natalie. [They hug.] How bad is it?  
NATALIE: [firm] Isaac will get through this.  
JEREMY: What do you know?  
NATALIE: Isaac's a fighter.  
JEREMY: Yeah. [release hug] Where is he? How's he doing?  
NATALIE: We think he's in the building, we know what ward he would be in, but we can't get any doctors to talk to us.  
JEREMY: We're reporters! We'll have to do investigative reporting!  
NATALIE: Exactly. Who should we talk to?  
JEREMY: It's been four hours. By now he'll have had a CT scan in emergency, and if it wasn't that severe, they'll have moved Isaac to neurology.  
NATALIE: Dan and Casey are already on it.  
JEREMY: Good.  
NATALIE: What if it was severe?  
JEREMY: Then we should check with emergency.  
NATALIE: [worried] Okay.  
JEREMY: He'll get through this.  
NATALIE: [squeezing Jeremy's hand as they exit] I hope so.  


[Cut to CASEY and DAN emerging from an elevator.]  


CASEY: Fourth floor: neurology.  
DAN: This is where Isaac would be, if Isaac were at this hospital.  
CASEY: Esther said Presbyterian.  
DAN: [stops] It's time.  
CASEY: [stops] Time for what?  
DAN: Time for the heavy artillery.  
CASEY: [catching on] The secret weapon.  
DAN: It's time, Casey, to play the fame card.  
CASEY: Are you ready to live forever?  
DAN: Yes.  
CASEY: Are you ready to learn how to fly?  
DAN: Let's just play the fame card.  
CASEY: Okay.  


[They approach a RECEPTIONIST at the counter, both looking halfway afraid to find out how Isaac is.]  


DAN: Hi.  
REC: [solid New York attitude] May I help you?  
DAN: I'm Dan Rydell, this is Casey McCall. You may recognize us from CSC's _Sports Night_.  
REC: Huh?  
CASEY: It's our TV show. We're trying to find our friend –   
REC: Anybody here watch _Sports Night_? [Chorus of replies evenly split between 'what?' and 'no.']  
REC #2: [points to CASEY] Wasn't he on _Jeopardy_?  
CASEY: That's right, I also appeared on _Celebrity Jeopardy!_, where I –  
REC #2: You people know so much about show tunes, it's scary.  
CASEY: Show tunes?  
REC: That's right, he ran the category.  
CASEY: 'You people?' What people?  
DAN: Casey, let's just go before it gets ugly.  
CASEY: What?  
DAN: Come with me. [They get a safe distance away.]   
CASEY: [puts it together] The entire nursing staff thinks I'm gay.  
DAN: What you should do now, is go back there and convince them you like women.  
CASEY: I will do that.  
DAN: I'll get everybody to watch. We can bring popcorn.  
CASEY: Maybe I won't do that.  
DAN: Casey, for a heterosexual man, you do know way too much about musical theater.  
CASEY: It was _Celebrity Jeopardy!_, Danny, a trained monkey could have gotten those.  
DAN: Hey Casey.  
CASEY: Oh, God.  
DAN: "This team prevailed in the 1998 World Series."  
CASEY: Dead horse, Danny.  
DAN: "What is _baseball?!_"  
CASEY: I misinterpreted the –  
DAN: What do you do for a living, again?   
CASEY: I work for a woman who shirks the show every time her desperate date decides he's more important than her life.  
DAN: That was last week, Casey.  
CASEY: Why's she with him?  
DAN: I have my theories.  
CASEY: She's attractive, she's professional, and she's just demeaning herself with this –  
[DANA enters. They go quiet.]  
DAN: [short beat] [dispirited] And that's all the material we have about Knoxville? [not looking at him] Right, Casey?  
DANA: Why aren't you in neurology?! Is Isaac there?  
CASEY: We don't know, Dana.  
DANA: Are you even trying to find Isaac? Why aren't you checking with neurology?  
DAN: [enjoying this] Because the nursing staff thinks Casey is gay.  
DANA: Casey.  
CASEY: [clenched teeth] What, Dana?  
DANA: This is low. I've seen low, and I've seen low from you, but this is the lowest. Do you even care about Isaac?   
CASEY: What?  
DANA: He could be dying Casey. As it is, Casey, his mind's probably gone, and you've been laughing and joking like it's no big deal.  
CASEY: I know. I know he could be… in a lot of trouble. Isaac's my friend, too, Dana. He's my boss, too.  
DANA: What does that mean?  
CASEY: It means I've been holding up my end of Isaac's show.  
DANA: Don't start with me.  
CASEY: I think I will.  
DANA: Don't.  
CASEY: Think I already have.  
DANA: I do not have to choose between being faithful to my show and having a relationship with Gordon.  
CASEY: And I'm saying you chose settling for Gordon.  
DANA: What do you mean, 'settling?!'  
CASEY: You feel like your clock is ticking and, well, Gordon has a pretty car and a nice degree, and well he'll have to do.  
DANA: Oh you are one to talk, married to Lisa for god's sake.  
CASEY: [beat; quietly] Dana, don't say things you won't be able to take back.  
DANA: You are not allowed to judge me, Casey. When it comes to whom I choose to spend my time with, you have no right to tell _anybody _what to do. And don't dare tell me I'm not doing my job. [She leaves]  
CASEY: It'll blow over.  
DAN: Tell her.  
CASEY: What?  
DAN: What? Nothing.  
CASEY: She just needs to cool down.  
DAN: Yeah, good thing we're at a hospital where one of our best friends might be dead. That'll really soothe her nerves.  
CASEY: I just don't need to deal with that now.  
DAN: Yeah.   
[DAN walks away, then stops in the doorway]   
CASEY: What is it?  
DAN: It's nothing. What's what?  
CASEY: No, it's obvious you've got something so important to say you've got to turn and say it from the door in your patented melodramatic Danny style.  
DAN: Fine! [Crossing back to him] Fine, I'll say it to your face!  
CASEY: Say what, Dan?  
DAN: That all this mess, all this subfertuge.  
CASEY: Subfertuge?  
DAN: Subfer – damn it, you know what I _mean_, Casey!  
CASEY: [sarcastic] What _do _you mean, Danny?  
DAN: [spelling it out] You are being a jerk. You're making Dana feel like crap, Casey, and she doesn't even know why, because _you_ haven't been menschy enough to tell her! You're lying to her every day, Casey, and she's eventually going to find out. Do you know how she's going to feel?  
CASEY: Dan –  
DAN: Because _I _have a pretty good idea. [short beat] You don't treat your _friends_ like that. I mean: _you_ don't treat your friends like that. [shrugging, smiling in disbelief] Especially not on an awful night like this.  
[JEREMY and NATALIE burst through the door. JEREMY is excited and cheerful. NATALIE is reading the two anchors' body language and is a bit wary.]  
JEREMY: I think this night is turning around!  
NATALIE: Is the masculine hygiene talk over?  
JEREMY: What the hell is –  
NATALIE: It's nothing.  
CASEY: Jeremy – what's up?  
JEREMY: Isaac is a lot better than we thought.  
CASEY: Do you know where he is?  
JEREMY: No.  
DAN: Can he walk?  
JEREMY: No.  
CASEY: Can he talk?  
JEREMY: Not that well.  
DAN: Is he awake?  
JEREMY: Probably not.  
CASEY: That's better than we thought?  
DAN: That's better than I thought.  
JEREMY: [frustrated at not getting his point across] No, he can't walk, but yes, he can learn to walk again. And it's true he won't be able to dance any time soon.   
CASEY: Hey, neither can Dan.  
DAN: Hey –  
JEREMY: That apart, I've talked to the EMT who brought Isaac in, and it looks like Isaac had a mild – that's the important word, mild – right-sided ischemic infarct. Typically this impairs speech and motor coordination, and Isaac has both of those problems. But, if Isaac undergoes aggressive physical therapy, it's not the end of the road at all.   
CASEY: What are you, a doctor all of a sudden?  
JEREMY: No, I dodged that bullet long ago.  
NATALIE: He would have been a good doctor.  
JEREMY: I would have been a miserable doctor.  
NATALIE: I think he would have been good.  
JEREMY: Well, you and my father.   
DAN: So Isaac will be okay?  
JEREMY: He has a lot of hard work ahead of him.  
DAN: Yeah, but this is _Isaac_.  
JEREMY: What do you mean?  
CASEY: Isaac can _do_ hard work.  


[DANA sits in a lobby near neurology, talking on her cell phone to Gordon. Across the room from her is a coffee vending machine.]  


DANA: [near tears] Gordon, please come. You should be here with me. I know it's silly. Because he's had a stroke. Yes, Isaac. Yes, him. And Casey's been acting –  
[DAN and CASEY enter.]  
DANA: Well, I need something, Gordon. Yes, I'm at Presbyterian. It's not far. [apologetic] No. No, that's fine.  
CASEY: [hating Gordon] I think I'll get some coffee.  
DANA: No, I understand. It's okay, don't… okay. [She beeps the phone off.]  
DAN: How was Gordon?  
DANA: I was thinking maybe he could stop by, and… it turns out he has to work early tomorrow anyway, so… [shrug] long days.  
[CASEY starts filling a cup from the dispenser]  
DAN: [full of irony] Say, Dana, Gordon's been working late a _lot_ lately.  
DANA: What does that – [CASEY crushes the Styrofoam cup in his hand; scalding coffee spills all over his hand. He shouts]  
CASEY: Naa-haaa-haa! [Hopping, holding hand in pain] Nyaa! Gaah! [Casey glares at Dan]  


* * *

  
[An observation room. CASEY is getting his hand bandaged by a DOCTOR. A SUPERVISOR looks on. DANA stands, waits, irate, in the corner.]  
DOCTOR: You should stay here and let it soak until I come back.  
CASEY: But I only burned my hand on the coffee machine.  
SUP: Well, we want to make sure that – [the DOCTOR leaves]  
CASEY: It's nothing.  
DANA: Great, how many forms does he have to fill out for this?  
SUP: Mr. McCall, we are so sorry about this mishap.   
CASEY: Jeez.  
SUP: We had been meaning to replace the coffee dispenser.  
CASEY: Okay.  
SUP: And we'd hate it if you felt like there was some animosity remaining, or some need of reciprocation, or if you felt you had to…  
DANA: What, sue?  
SUP: [clears throat] We don't like that word.  
DANA: Well, maybe I _do _like that word –  
SUP: We want this to inconvenience you as little as possible.  
DANA: He appears on a national TV show every night. Now his hand is going to be bandaged up?  
SUP: I'm just saying if there anything we can do for you, please ask. Is there anything at all you need?  
DANA: [an idea] Yes. Yes, sir. We need answers.  
SUP: Answers?  
CASEY: [catching on] Our friend, Isaac Jaffe. He's had a stroke.   
DANA: [all business] We want to know where he is. We want to talk to a doctor about his condition. We'd like to see him, if it's at all possible.  
SUP: I'll be right back. [He leaves.]  
CASEY: [screwing up his courage] What Dan and I were talking about earlier.   
DANA: Huh?  
CASEY: It wasn't Knoxville.  
DANA: What was it?  
CASEY: [sighs, screws up his courage] There's this one shirt that I like. [pause, self-doubt]  
DANA: Okay.  
CASEY: And – [SUPERVISOR enters]   
SUP: I believe I've found him.  
DANA: Isaac?  
CASEY: That fast?  
SUP: He was in our computers as Isaac _Jeffery_.   
DANA: Oh, god!  
CASEY: Dana –  
DANA: I _knew _it.  
SUP: I've told Dr. Ramunjan to meet you and your friends outside his room, that's 509-C. The doctor should be there in a few minutes.  
DANA: Great.  
SUP: Are you sure you're all right, Mr. McCall?  
CASEY: [annoyed] I'm fine.  
SUP: Wonderful. Wonderful. [He exits.]  
DANA: [getting up] I'm going to go talk to –  
CASEY: Dana, what I was saying before was about…  
DANA: About what?  
CASEY: About why I thought you were… 'settling.'  
DANA: Why?  
CASEY: [all through this, he's trying to say what's on his mind, but not say _exactly_ what's on his mind.] Because you deserve better. You deserve somebody that loves you because _of _your devotion to what you do, not in spite of it. That's who you are, and nobody –  
DANA: Casey, if you'd just give him a chance, he's funny, and he's charming, and he treats me really well, and –  
CASEY: No, he doesn't.  
DANA: What?  
CASEY: He doesn't treat you really well.  
DANA: What, is he planning to kill me or something?  
CASEY: No. It's… it's nothing.  
DANA: That's all you had to say?  
CASEY: [… and failing.] Yeah.  
DANA: Casey, Gordon's had an intense load of cases lately.  
CASEY: Yeah.  
DANA: And it's not up to you who I date, and if you have a problem with it, then you can't just act like a jerk, and –   
CASEY: You're right. That's no excuse. [really trying to tell her] You just deserve somebody who would be here with you right now, instead of staying home and going to bed early. [bitter] For work. [DANA titters] What?  
DANA: It's so obvious.  
CASEY: What is?  
DANA: You're very protective. [CASEY winces] No, it's nice.  
CASEY: You should go back upstairs. I can wait here.  
DANA: Don't worry. [mock-conspiratorial] I know your secret, and it's safe with me.  
CASEY: [very evenly – what does she know about Sally?] You know my secret?  
DANA: I know. [as she leaves] And I think it's sweet!  
[Reaction shot of CASEY; he is confused]  


[Cut to DANA walking into another lobby, with a DOCTOR and JEREMY, NATALIE, and DAN.]  


DAN: This is ridiculous! We've looked all over the hospital and now we can't talk to him?  
DOCTOR: The man's exhausted.   
JEREMY: Is Isaac asleep?  
DOCTOR: No, but –  
DANA: [Odd determination] I have to see him.   
DOCTOR: Okay, I'll let one of you in, but just for a little bit.  
DANA: It should be me.   
DAN: No, me! [Everyone else starts talking]  
DOCTOR: Fine, okay. I'm thinking of a number.  
DANA: Five.  
DOCTOR: You're a mind-reader. Amazing. Come with me. [They exit.]  
NATALIE: What the hell was that?  
JEREMY: It looks like Dana's a mind-reader.  
DAN: I've seen Mexican wrestling matches that were less fixed than that. [sighs – DAN and NATALIE sit]  
JEREMY: [suddenly tired] Anyone want a soda?   
NATALIE: I would, if you can find a machine in this maze.   
JEREMY: I shall do my best. [JEREMY exits.]   
NATALIE: Hey Dan.   
DAN: Hey what?  
NATALIE: [moves her right hand from right to left across her face, waggling one raised right index finger back and forth as she does so.] What's this?  
DAN: I give up. What?  
NATALIE: [repeats the gesture] I dunno, but there goes another one.  
DAN: Natalie, telling me bad jokes isn't going to make me feel better.  
NATALIE: Hey Dan.  
DAN: What?  
NATALIE: [moves her right hand from right to left across her face, waggling all five fingers back and forth as she does so.] What's this?  
DAN: [intrigued] I don't know. What?  
NATALIE: [repeats first gesture] A whole herd of those.   
DAN: That is the dumbest joke I've ever heard. [short pause. Dan stifles a laugh.]  
NATALIE: Hey Dan.  
DAN: Hey what?  
NATALIE: A rabbit, a priest, and a man holding a turtle walk into a bar –  
DAN: Don't you mean a rabbi?  
NATALIE: No, in this one, it's a rabbit.  


[DANA walks into the patient room. The radio is playing an old Sam Cooke tune in the background.]  
_ Another Saturday night, and I ain't got nobody  
I got some money 'cause I just got paid  
I wish I had someone to talk to  
I'm in an awful way…  
_ DANA: [flummoxed at not knowing what to say; little laugh] They turned on the radio for you. It's nice. [Isaac scowls.] They turned on the radio and you didn't want them to. [She clicks it off] Better? [He smiles. She sits by the bed.] Oh, Isaac. Esther's on the next flight back with your daughter, and Cathy is flying in, and, and everybody's here, Isaac, Casey, and Dan, and Natalie, and Jeremy, only they wouldn't let [starts to cry, catches herself, restarts] there was this really mean doctor who wouldn't let anybody in. [smiles] Just me. You look good. [Isaac puts on a "don't bullshit me" look.] You _do_. [Isaac is pleased] Things at work have been good. [beat] Expanded coverage had our best ratings this year, and… things at work have _sucked_. I've been trying to hold on to Gordon, and he's gonna dump me, and Casey's been a total prick lately, and Dan just found out his girlfriend's married – to another total and utter prick, and now this. Why did you_ do_ this, Isaac? Why now? [Isaac scowls.] I'm sorry – I'm so sorry – that's silly. Natalie says everything happens for a reason, Isaac, but this doesn't make any sense. You're the only one that has it together and we've got nothing to be proud of.  


[ISAAC starts trying to talk; he's tired. It's gotten much harder. He's obviously frustrated.]  
DANA: Oh, you don't have to… to talk or anything. You should rest. They said you should rest – and they're doctors.   
ISAAC: I am.  
DANA: What? What is it, Isaac?  
ISAAC: Proud.  
DANA: [starting to lose it] Oh, I – I know. [beat] I love you Isaac. [He's already asleep. In the background, a nurse enters.] Oh, God, I didn't kill him, did I?  
NURSE: [suspicious] No.   
DANA: [she didn't see the nurse enter] Aaah!  
NURSE: He's just sleeping.  
DANA: Oh. Oh yeah, the thing's still beeping. That's a 'he's still alive' beep.  
NURSE: Ma'am, you _know_ these aren't visiting hours.  
DANA: Right. Right, I'm now going. I – [she's not going yet] you, listen, you'll take good care of him, right? Because –  
NURSE: Yes, but you'll have to go!  
DANA: Okay, I'm shooing myself out. But – you remember what I almost said.  
NURSE: Sure.  


[Cut back to NATALIE and DAN.] 

NATALIE: And then the priest said –  
DAN: If he said "He won by a hare," I swear I will –  
NATALIE: No. That would be bad.  
DAN: What'd he say?  
NATALIE: "He won by a hare!"  
DAN: [shaking his head, chuckling] That's _so bad_.  
NATALIE: I know.  
DAN: It does make me feel better.  
NATALIE: If I had known she was married, Danny –  
DAN: Hey – it's not your fault.  
NATALIE: I know.  
DAN: It's not.  
NATALIE: It's Rebecca's fault.  
DAN: Kinda.  
NATALIE: [hugs Dan] Dana and I have decided we don't like her. [JEREMY enters]  
JEREMY: Hey, hey, what's going on here?  
NATALIE: No! We've been caught!  
DAN: [mock serious] Don't worry, Jeremy. I only go for married women. [A little hurt by his own joke.]  
JEREMY: Natalie? Are you secretly married?  
NATALIE: [melodramatic] Yes! To Steve Cisco!  
DAN: Oh, god…  
NATALIE: Dan. Was Rebecca trying to hurt you?  
DAN: [smiles] No.  
NATALIE: Is she still being nice to you?  
DAN: Yeah.  
JEREMY: Is there _any_ chance that Steve Cisco will have a debilitating stroke?  
DAN: Maybe.  
NATALIE: Jeremy!  
JEREMY: You're right, that's evil.  
DAN: Steve Cisco will be fine.  
NATALIE: You'll be okay, Danny. [DAN smiles.]  
DAN: I know. I mean, if they break up, I'll get back together with her. And if they don't, I'll help her out as her friend.  
JEREMY: Good plan.  
DAN: … and that's how you treat your friends at times like this.  
  


[The end of [_Try Whistling This_][1] (the track right before [_She Will Have Her Way_][2]) plays slowly, as we dolly through the hospital.]  
_and my words are ringing in your ears  
drawing your attention now to all the things that you ignore  
_[CASEY walks down a hallway, hand bandaged, enters the waiting room and greets DAN, NATALIE, and JEREMY, who are talking. He asks them a question, they point him to another door. On his way out, DAN stops him, they have a quick exchange. DAN pats him on the back as CASEY goes on to the lobby outside Isaac's room, and sits at a couch. He waits for a second, impatiently, then DANA emerges from the room and smiles. She sits beside him, looks down at her hands in her lap. At the same time, he reflexively puts his arm around her, stops himself before she sees, then rests a hand on her near shoulder instead. She looks at him, still worried but smiling, puts her hand on his.]   
_if I can't be with you I would rather have a different face  
_[fade to title]  
_and if I can't be near you I would rather be adrift in space  
_[music fadeout; end credits]   


   [1]: http://www.cdnow.com/cgi-bin/mserver/SID=1834077345/pagename=/share/soundclip.html/itemdescriptionid=508649/disc=01/track=04/source=MP2/mpeg=2/mp2.mp2
   [2]: http://www.cdnow.com/cgi-bin/mserver/SID=1834077345/pagename=/share/soundclip.html/itemdescriptionid=508649/disc=01/track=05/source=MP2/mpeg=2/mp2.mp2



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